How to explain Bitcoin and cryptocurrency to your parents
“What is this Bitcoin thing?” says your mother as she passes you a hefty bowl of mashed sweet potatoes.
Dad pauses, mid-nibble on a turkey leg to chime in, “Yeah, is that real money?”
Oh God, they want to have The Talk.
SEE ALSO:Ron Paul is now selling your grandparents Bitcoin on Fox NewsDon't be surprised if you’re confronted with similar questions as you and millions of other digitally savvy millennials and Gen Zers trudge back home for the annual Thanksgiving Day meal.
It’s a time to reconnect with family and for family to try and pick your brain about all the culture and new-fangled technology they still don’t understand.
This is how you can talk to Mom and Dad about the monetary revolution that lives at the intersection of technology and finance.
It’s money
Do not start with “Bitcoin is a cryptocurrency,” because you will lose Mom and Dad right there. Defining something unknown with something equally unknown is a big no-no.
You can say, instead, “Bitcoins are like regular money or even, in a small way, stocks.”
“How can it be like both?” they will ask you.
This is how you can talk to Mom and Dad about the monetary revolution that lives at the intersection of technology and finance.
“Well, it’s like money in that it has value and you can use it to buy goods and services. It’s also like stock because the value fluctuates based on supply and demand. Unlike stock, there are no dividends, just whatever the bitcoin is worth on a given day.”
Mom and Dad may smile knowingly at this, pleased that they can show you how well they grasp monetary fundamentals and, maybe by extension, bitcoins.
Of course, they will have more questions.
“So where are these bitcoins?” your Dad might ask, “Do you have any in your pocket?”
At this moment, a rueful head shake is in order. This will also give you time to take a bite of stuffing before responding.
“No, bitcoins are like the money you have in the bank and credit cards. Or, better yet, you know how your boss pays you through direct deposit and then you go buy something with a debit card. The money goes from one place to the next without ever touching human hands. Bitcoins are perpetually in that state. Some call it…” No, stop yourself from saying “a virtual currency” because then you will have to explain the term “virtual.”
Regroup and add, “It just seems different than regular money, but this is actually one of the ways it's similar.”
“My money comes from my job,” says Dad, “and, I guess, the bank, and, I guess before that the government that prints it. Where does bitcoin come from?”
I know, this is the tough part. I suggest going for an analogy.
Mount Bitcoin
“Okay, for the sake of argument, let’s imagine there’s this thing called Mount Bitcoin. It’s a mountain made up of 21 million bitcoins.”
Mom puts down her fork and stares back at you, “Wait, there’s a mountain of bitcoins? You said they weren’t real.”
“No, mom, there isn't a real mountain. I’m just trying to paint a picture.”
Just like the dollar can be broken into pennies and dimes, each bitcoin can be broken down into many smaller, distributable and usable pieces of currency
“Okay, so to get the bitcoin out of Mount Bitcoin, you have to mine. Those who mine bitcoin do it through their computers with a lot of computational power. It's like mining another scarce resource, gold, which also required specialized and expensive equipment. So, these bitcoin miners are giving up something in the hopes of getting, maybe, one bitcoin that can be broken up into many little pieces and distributed in exchange for the kind of money you’re familiar with.”
Dad has the look of someone who understands exactly 50% of what you’re saying. “Broken up?”
“Just like the dollar can be broken into pennies and dimes, each bitcoin can be broken down into many smaller, distributable, and usable pieces of currency, which makes sense because a single Bitcoin can be worth $8,000.”
“$8,000?!” you mother gasps. “That’s not like the dollar at all.”
You let this pass.
“So,” says Dad, pointing a wing in your direction,” There’s a limited number of these things, you have to have special hardware and software to extract them and then you have to figure out how to distribute them? I think I’ll keep my dollars.”
Now it’s your turn to smile knowingly.
Do not show them this picture of physical Bitcoins, it will only confuse them.Credit: REX/Shutterstock“Ah, Dad, but there are so many good reasons to switch to a bitcoin economy,” you smile. An overstatement, sure, but do not pause, just launch into the good stuff.
“First of all, there are no banks involved.” Mom and Dad exchange surprised and, maybe even, pleased glances.
“This is all what’s known as a peer-to-peer monetary system. No bank has to approve the transaction. No bank can be hacked or invest and lose your money. If you want to receive bitcoin, you give someone your account number and they send it to you (usually in exchange for traditional money). If you want to access your bitcoin to spend you just need your own private key.”
'Private key?!' barks Dad. 'You know how many keys we’ve lost around here? I do not need another key.'
“Private key?!” barks Dad. “You know how many keys we’ve lost around here? I do not need another key.”
“No, no, Dad, not a real key, just another code, like the 4-digit pin code you’ve memorized for your bank card.”
This appears to mollify your parents for a moment. They both have debit cards and have managed to memorize that code. You don’t bother to add that the private key is a lot more complex. Maybe next Thanksgiving.
Before they can ask another question, you launch into the second big benefit of bitcoin.
“And this is a true global currency. A bitcoin is usable everywhere and worth the same everywhere. No one country can over-inflate the value or devalue it, for instance, by making more. There is only so much bitcoin available in the world.”
“You said 21 million,” chimes in Mom.
“Er, right, but not all of it has been mined. Remember, Mount Bitcoin is still there and will be until 2140.”
Dad looks confused and mouths “2140?” but you ignore him.
Let’s buy something
“How can I spend it if I can’t see it?” blurts out Mom.
“So, the whole of bitcoin, all the transactions exist in the cloud and on everyone’s computers. As people collect and spend bitcoins, it’s all tracked. No one can see what you have or spent or get, but the system keeps track of it all. It’s a big ledger that keeps everyone honest.”
Mom and Dad have stopped eating now and are just staring at you, their mouths agape. You can see little bits of stuffing and cranberry sauce on their teeth. You’ve lost them.
“That ledger... it’s called a blockchain.”
This isn’t helping.
Mom and Dad have stopped eating now and are just staring at you, their mouths agape. You can see little bits of stuffing and cranberry sauce on their teeth. You’ve lost them.
“OK, OK, think of the Blockchain or ledger as a digital accountant. It’s like QuickBooks that manages itself as long as everyone logs their bitcoin activities with their keys.”
Dad suddenly looks excited, like he really gets it. “So, my bitcoins are stored in the ledger!” he says, triumphantly,
“Not exactly.”
Dad’s shoulders slump. “So, where’s my money? Where are my bitcoins?”
“Excellent question. Unspent transactions are on the blockchain, but unique numbers to unlock those bitcoins are in your wallet.”
Mom jumps up from her seat, spilling apple cider across the white linen. “You said there was no physical money! Why do I need a wallet?!”
“Mom, sit, it’s a digital wallet. Like the one you know have in your iPhone. Bitcoins have their own IDs that cannot be changed. In this case, your wallet full of bitcoins IDs is stored on your computer or online. You can even write down those codes and keep them in your real wallet, but I wouldn’t recommend it.”
Bitcoin valuation is on the rise.Credit: CoindeskMom and Dad are now nodding slowly. This may indicate they finally understand or that they’ve been hypnotized by my steady stream of bitcoin terms. Finally, Mom speaks up.
“Where can I spend bitcoin?”
You want to say, “With your local drug dealer,” since you know that's how bitcoins were most widely used, but I try to put a more family-friendly spin on it.
“Where can I spend bitcoin?”
“Well, since there’s no transaction charged for spending, say, a few pennies, you could use it on web sites that accept micro-transactions. However, a lot of people are using them for investments. Like, they’re putting money in bitcoins because the returns are better.”
“Better, how?” Mom and Dad say in unison.
“Well, Bitcoin values have been pretty volatile. In the last year, one bitcoin has jumped from $4,000 to over $8,000.”
At this, Dad takes out his phone and starts punching in some numbers. “That’s a better return than the S&P 500.”
You grab your fork and prepare to start eating again. “So, does that make sense? Do you finally understand bitcoin?”
Dad and mom nod their head enthusiastically. Then mom points her fork at you, “What do you know about Ethereum?”
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